


To Be In Those Arms Again

by meredithleon



Category: Shadowhunters (TV), The Mortal Instruments Series - Cassandra Clare
Genre: A little angst, Bathtubs, Fluff, M/M, Rated for a little nudity, Unbeta'd, post s2e20
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-09-12
Updated: 2017-09-12
Packaged: 2018-12-26 22:52:08
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,385
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12068586
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/meredithleon/pseuds/meredithleon
Summary: "What do you say, let's get out of here.""Yes"My take on what happens when Magnus and Alec go back to the loft after the party. Some inspiration from Todd's comment about "Sandalwood shampoo", though no sandalwood will be seen here.





	To Be In Those Arms Again

**Author's Note:**

> Hey there, this is my second shadowhunters fanfic. Unbeta'd again, unfortunately I don't know many people in this fandom. 
> 
> I try my best, but please forgive the mistakes that are bound to be.

It’s a not silent walk back to the loft. Walking in sync, Alec’s arms around Magnus’s shoulder and the other man holding him near by the waist, staying close after days of separation. Alec revels in the intimacy of their hold. Revels in the fact that he can have this with Magnus again. Not because he deserves it, but because Magnus has the biggest damn heart and Alec was telling the truth when he said he can’t live without him. 

Alec thinks he can never apologize enough for the way he’s treated Magnus, for not trusting him with the truth and lying to him. For always coming to him for his help and taking him for granted. When he looks back at their relationship, it’s always been Alec stepping out of the line and Magnus forgiving him… everything, every transgression, every harsh word or neglect. They are talking about the party, or rather Magnus is talking about the party, Alec is content listening to him talk without the scorn of the last few days filling his voice, just happy to be with him again. He smiles whenever Magnus looks at him and answers when he asks a question. Izzy thinks he’s whipped, maybe he is, but this is happiest he’s been in all his life and however he gets to keep it, he will. 

Magnus moves away from him as his building gets closer, making him feel bereft. He stops at the door and turns to Alec, “would you like to come up?” Alec doesn’t say anything and just nods his head, dumbfounded. He can’t really believe this is happening and it’s not a dream, that Magnus is really inviting him into his home after the last two times he had almost closed the door in Alec’s face. He follows Magnus, watching him, enchanted by his fluid movements. He feels his heart thumping against his ribcage so fast he fears it might jump out his chest. 

Being inside Magnus’s loft feels like coming home after such a long time he’s forgotten all the details. He wants to cry, fall down on his knees and just… stay there till he feels worthy again. Instead he manages a shaky smile, gulping against his spasming throat when Magnus turns to him after discarding his jacket on the couch. This is familiar to him, them walking home together after a date, Magnus getting rid of his ostentatious jackets and throwing them anywhere he wants before turning to him with a soft smile. It aches. Not being sure of what to do next. When another time he would have just walked up to the other man, held his face in his hands and kissed him. 

“I’m…” Magnus seems to be considering his words. “About that hot bath, would you like to join me?” It’s a generous offer, one he doesn’t know how to interpret. Has Magnus really forgiven him? Does he mean it? Because if he doesn’t, it would be cruel to play with his heart like that. Not after Alec has bared his soul to him. 

“I…”

“Alexander, I wouldn’t have offered if I hadn’t meant it.”

Alec closes his eyes and breathes out a sigh, “Okay… I’ll… Yes.”

 

He can’t really tell how he came to stand next to Magnus’s giant bathtub, clothes shucked off somewhere on the way, in just his underwear and uncertain of his next move. He waits while Magnus runs the water and adds twenty different salts and oils to it. The warlock steps inside and turns to Alec, a content smile on his face as he says, “hmm… just the way I like it. Come on in Alec, let’s not waste perfectly warm water.” Alec hesitates, days of not even talking to each other has taken its toll on him. He’s undecided and not very sure of what’s happening. Is this what couples do? Fight and then make up, without really discussing what caused them to fight in the first place? Without hearing the words “I forgive you”? Without… it’s just that… they haven’t really talked. And he doesn’t know if it’s appropriate to jump into the intimacy of showering together immediately after the big argument they’d had. They have always talked before, always discussed and tried to clear their problems before sharing an intimate moment.

But Magnus looks at him with naked emotions. He’s hopeful, he has a soft smile on his face and his eyes shine with affection. And really, Alec has never been able to say no to that face. So he removes the remaining clothes and steps inside the tub. 

They stand in the center, just looking at each other. After a few seconds though, the intensity in Magnus’s gaze starts to make him uncomfortable, and Alec moves his eyes down, looking at the foamy water below their knees. Magnus chuckles, at some private thought Alec isn’t sure, but feels someone should break the silence which is as thick as the steam rapidly filling the room. “Let’s just… uh…?” But Alec never said he was a man of many words and as he fumbles with something to say, Magnus lowers himself to lie down in the tub and looks up at Alec expectantly. It’s a position Alec would have loved to explore before… now, it just makes him nervous. He lowers himself, taking care not to slosh water over the edge and settles on the opposite side of Magnus, bending his knees and putting his legs on one side mirroring the older man. 

“Would you care for a drink?” Magnus asks. Alec nods, lips quirking on their own. With the click of Magnus’s fingers, they both have a drink in their hands with a soft music playing from somewhere within the loft. It’s beautiful, just as the man in front of him. He feels so, so grateful that Magnus is giving him another chance, giving _them_ another chance. Just hearing his voice, listening to him rambling about everything under the sun, its calming to Alec. He understands that Magnus is just as nervous as he is. It’s how they are opposites, one talks too much while the other shuts off when they are anxious. But they work so well with each other, like pieces of a puzzle just meant to be put together to make a whole. 

Alec takes a sip from his flute as he tries to swallow past the tightness in his throat. “Magnus, thank you” he says. Magnus raises an eyebrow, looking at him questioningly. “You. Wanting to be with me. Even after all I did. I just…” 

Magnus sighs and puts away the crystal in his hand. “Alec. You have already apologized enough. You are young and don’t always know the best. But that’s okay. Everyone makes mistakes. That’s how you live and learn.” 

Alec shakes his head, not looking at him. His eyes fill up and his chest tightens.

Magnus puts away his glass and gestures “Come here.” Alec hesitates, again not really understanding where this is going. Magnus lets out an impatient huff and says, “Alexander. Come here. Please.”

The “please” sways him. Alec moves and Magnus shifts trying to make room for him. Shuffling, trying to be comfortable until Alec is sitting between Magnus’s legs, back to the older man’s chest. Magnus presses a gentle kiss against the side of his neck, just above his rune. “I love you, Alexander.” He breathes against the sensitive skin, making Alec close his eyes and rest his head against Magnus’s shoulder. Tilting his head to press a light kiss against the side of the beautiful warlock’s lips, Alec whispers, “I love you too.” Magnus tightens his arms around his chest, holding him closer. 

And if Alec finally breaks down and cries for the first time in days, it’s in the arms of his lover who has always trusted him and whom he can trust with his own vulnerability. Who will not betray him like his parents did, harass him or make fun of his emotions. And as Magnus kisses the tears on his cheeks, he realizes he doesn’t always have to be soldier either. That Magnus will love him, even when he’s not. Magnus is his first love, but he will also be his last because Alec knows everything else will pale next to this.

**Author's Note:**

> I hope you enjoyed this.  
> Please let me know what you think, all comments and constructive criticism are welcome.


End file.
